Brian Poulter was born in 1963, a few short weeks before the assassination of John F. Kennedy- it was not his fault. From this national tragedy he moved on and was soon tormenting the peoples of the greater Midwest.

He spent his younger years pondering the questions that test the intellects of all men: What is the meaning of life? Why am I here? Who invented liquid soap and why? The search for the answers to these questions would lead him to a position as a busboy at the local Embers Restaurant which began his rocket-like rise from lowly busboy to salad bar chef, and eventually host. For Brian it was the best of times, the worst of times, it was a far far better thing that he did than he had ever done before, against the tattered tapestry of a God-fearing nation, a new dream was born, conceived in liberty, and only $3.75 before 5 p.m. But try as he might he could not find Waldo.

What followed was a series of disappointing stage and screen failures including; The Way the West was Misplaced, Much Fondue About Nothing, Some Like it Microwaved, and From Here to Fraternity. Upset and feeling misunderstood he left Wisconsin for the green, green, pastures of Winona State University, Winona Minnesota. There he received a degree in Mass Communication, and several parking tickets from the campus cops. While there he befriended any number of small woodland animals.

Try as he might he could not defend the designated batter in American League Baseball play, he felt lost, confused, and like many other lost and confused people, he felt confused . . . and lost. Remember contents may settle during shipment (Do not staple, fold or mutilate).

After working for several years as a photojournalist, Brian decided that real work was a lot of real work, and he, like many other lazy people, should go to graduate school. Because of his affinity for the previously discussed woodland creatures, he decided to attend the University of Wisconsin Madison, home of Bucky Badger.

After graduating from school with a Master of Fine Arts degree, more parking tickets, and some library fines, he decided to get a job. Needing a job that would pay the lucrative amounts necessary to pay off his parking tickets, and as he still held a soft-spot in his heart for the aforementioned woodland creatures, he selected Eastern Illinois University, home of Billy (formally "Prowler") Panther, as his newfound home.

Here he prospored until he was seduced by the siren song of a Russian Motorcycle with side car. This is when things got interesting...

To be continued...

*Programs are available in the lobby.
Remember, only you can prevent forest fires.